Thank you..India

I am sick and tired of some total Chutiyas (that’s Hindi for fucking idiot) who don’t know shit from pudding having the balls to come up to me and ridiculing my country. The next person who does it gets kicked in the crotch. You have been warned. To put things in perspective….

Singapore
Area: 683 sq km
Population:4 million

India
Area:3.28 million sq km
Population: 1 billion

That’s right- we can kick all your collective lame asses a hundred times over and still be back home before dinner. In fact, Mumbai alone has 17 million bad-asses who can piss all over you. So the next time you try to compare your country (and I am not just talking about Singapore) save yourselves a whole lot of humiliation (because everyone will know who ignorant and painfully stupid you are and how your parents were too stupid to teach you how to read books or watch news) Oh no, she didnt.

Yesterday, this stupid woman ( its like they’re everywhere) says to me… I heard the whole of India is flooded… no shit. I ate my own tongue in agony. No wonder singapore needs foreign talent, what with a stagnant population (thank god these people are breeding as much as they ought to) of bumbling idiots.

Now, I turn to white people… “oh I am so white.. India is too darned brown and dirty for me…”Listen up.. you know those “bohemian” long skirts you are so crazy about these days, yeah those colorful patchwork style ten metre long skirts you’re paying 100$ for at mango? They’re factory rejects from Indian mills from the 1950s. And after the 50s, poor people made their bedsheets with patchwork and left over fabric. So fuck all of you copycats.

I am also sick of people moaning about how spicy Indian food is… bunch of spineless wusses. Everytime someone says “Oh…I cant “take” Indian food.. its too spicy for me” I just wanna shove a large chilly up their asses. If you can’t take it, then don’t. We didnt ask you to, and we didnt make our food for you anyway. Quit telling me about your food preferences just to prove that you’re a world citizen and that you’d love to patronise me by eating my food but God gave you shoddy intestines and you’re doomed to a life of eating bland tepid crap.

Speaking of patronising, I cannot count the number of times some Chinese or white guy came up to me and said “Aishwarya Rai is so hot”. Just because I am Indian, doesnt mean I need to know which Indian chick you wank off to. Wow, you like her? You must be a really keen Indophile.
They think they’re making me feel proud of my country because we produced one beautiful woman? Well, there are plenty more where that came from.

The other day I read that foreigners either love India or hate it. Fine. If you love it, I’m glad God gave you some sense. If you hate it, fuck off..and don’t tell me. If you don’t like India, that’s your problem. Eventually Indians will kick your ass. Because, here’s the truth that you don’t wanna hear–WE ARE SMARTER THAN YOU.

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2 thoughts on “Thank you..India

  1. Singaporeans believe that this is the greatest country…truth is this is a friggin hell hole…yeah, it maybe perfect and safe in every sense…but i think it makes people here stuck up and horribly boring…Whats life if it has no spice in it?!Singapore is monotonous…and after being in this country for 5 long years, I am missing the crowded buses n trains, the traffic jams and the million other reasons why Mumbai is better off than this sick country…..and this comes from a person who isn’t the biggest patriot(Don’t even get me started on technicalities of the “Democracy” that this country boasts of!)

  2. First things first…JAI HIND :DMan, some day you must’ve had when you worte this post (I know I’ve checked it veeery late)…But then, Im with you when you say “If you don’t like India, that’s your problem. Eventually Indians will kick your ass.”…way to go…Also read your post about the I.T. professionals in India…well, I am one…so no comments :)…Although I do agree there are some people out there who cook up a delusive figure of themselves…TC…~Ammo.

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