So Mr.Virdee somehow knew that I would have no plans on Saturday night …and was gracious enough to give me some homework.
These lists are for people who think they know me, or for people who don’t know me. These lists will NOT improve your knowing-me situation one bit.
Seven things I plan to do before I die
1. Play guitar and sing in a rock band, even if its just once (because there wont be a second time)
2. Work full-time for the WWF for at least some time
3. Have a totally designer marriage
4. Have my entire family stay with me abroad
5. Travel to everywhere! ( Includes that sexy aqua bar in Berlin that is oh-so-naughty)
6. Own the most beautiful clothes and shoes from all my favorite designers (with my own dough)
7. Forgive myself for wearing leather
Seven things I CAN do
1. Look sexy without trying too hard
2. Cook food so good that you worship me (better than your mother)
3. Put thoughts in married/attached men (Oh no no.. that’s not good!)
4. Beat any odd guy’s ass in drinking
5. Beat just about anybody in academics
6. Speak 9 languages to various degrees of fluency
7. Just about anything that isnt in the “i cant do” list below.
Seven things I CAN’T do
1. Ask a guy out (this is more of a “wont”)
2. Tell my parents that I love them
3. Save money
4. Give someone the benefit of the doubt
5. Play sports without getting my ass whooped
6. Control my temper
7. Eat meat anymore
Seven things I say most
1. Fuck! Bitch! Whore! Fucker! Asshole! Assface! Asswipe! ( and in 9 languages too)
2. How do I look?
3. …Aur kya chal raha hai?/What else is up?
4. I went shopping today…
5. Chalo then, you take care of yourself ok?
6. ITS NOT MY FAULT, HOW IS THAT MY FAULT?, THATS MY FAULT BECAUSE…?
7. Oh my god that is soooo cool!
Seven things that attract me to the opposite sex.
1. Looks (includes eyes, smile, hair, nose, hands, shoulders,butt..)
3. Being a Mumbaikar or Italian
4. Fashion sense ( he be knowin em Zegnas from his Pradas)
5. Worshipping me
6. Shared ideas
7. The possibility of making pretty children?
(Okay…I just made this list up..I have no idea what I am attracted to)
Seven celebrity crushes
1. Hugh Jackman (Wolverine!)
2. Shah Rukh Khan (Pyaar kartee ho mujhse?sabse jyaada)
3. Ewan McGregor (I can have his children)
4. Matthew Perry (We can laugh and snort coke together)
5. Ashton Kucher (for sex only please)
6. Ben Stiller (cute and has a sense of humour?!)
7. Salma Hayek (its hero-worship, okay?)
Wanna know more? I think not…