The incomplete list of reasons why Christmas and New year’s are over-rated.
(And don’t even think about labelling me anti-Catholic. I was raised tolerant to religion, and not to mindless propaganda. And certainly not to giant plastic snowmen and cotton snowflakes.)
1. Noone is really celebrating Christmas for Christmas’s sake anymore.
2. Compulsary exhorbitant Christmas Dinners at hotels- What the hell is this all about?
3. The sales are NOT GOOD ENOUGH! Summer clothing sales in London, woolen coats for sale in the tropics…
4. 95% of the office is on holiday, leaving the remaining 5% with 100% of the work.
5. New year countdown shows on TV…what’s the point here? Wouldn’t it be easier to just disembowel yourself?
6. Another Christmas compilation CD? I choose death.
7. Christmas-themed movies are an insult to the collective intelligence of the human race. Boycott them.
8. Some lame excuse for a human being got away with remixing Silent night, Holy night.
9. Coca-Cola sold us a red-and-white Santa Claus. And we bought it.
10. But does everything have to be red and green? I think I’ll have a siezure now.
11. There is too much pressure to have a good time.
12. Travelling is ten times more expensive, and still all the retards insist on travelling anyway.
13. Too much marketing has ruined it. Its that sick feeling, like drinking a mug of caramel syrup.
14. This one’s personal- All the damn desserts have raisins and fruits and miscellaneous shit like that. In general, Christmas desserts suck.
15. Mistletoe and New year’s eve- Concepts that make single people feel like shit, and induce unnecessary pressure to find a damn date.
16. White Christmas- Just a grand shenanigan used to justify horrendous, unbearable winters and promote tourism in countries with horrendous, unbearable winters.
17. Here’s the universal truth- ALL NEW YEAR PARTIES SUCK.No matter where they are held, who hosts them, how much booze they have, they all suck.(If you don’t agree, you have low party standards)
18. Christmas decorations have grown bigger and bigger, and thereby garish and stubbornly ugly. Jesus is not amused by your ugly tree.
19. I don’t feel any different after counting down than I do before. 10-9-8-7-6-m-y-a-s-s
20. Seriously, do they know its Christmas time at all?
I know I’m right. Now, kiss my feet.