I changed my hair can’t you tell?
dont you think it’s pretty as hell?
I know I know, I’m frikkin cute!
Looking good is my strongest suit.
Why sms when you can just as easily call?
My expectations aren’t that tall,
Of course I hope you exercise no thrift,
When you buy me that superfantastic gift.
Ask me my age, I’ll certainly lie…
Tell me I’m old and I’ll certainly cry,
I know I’m almost an old fart
But wrinkles notwithstanding, I’m young at heart!
My own party, I’ll be fashionably late
So kindly check in your egos at the gate,
And pander selflessly to mine,
While I pay for you to wine and dine.
New clothes, watch, shoes-I look perfect,
I’ll hate you for it if you forget,
For nice presents, brownie points you’ll get
From this material-girl-bachelorette.
Glittering eyeshadow and shimmering dust,
I will make you love and lust,
Lose yourself in my eyes if you must,
Dahling, I know I’m fabulous!
This rhyme, I know, is damn silly
So come along, and laugh with me
It’s a lovely august day,
What can I say
besides, Happy Birthday to me!
It’s good to be in love with yourself. That’s one relationship that never fails to disappoint.
A toast…. to me… whether you come to the party or not.