modern man

I got my passport back from the Brazilian consulate and Bunny and I have started chalking out our Brazilian holiday. Unfortunately Bunny has fewer vacation days so we can’t stay in Rio as long as I’d like to but I’d be damned if I didn’t make it work. So far we have booked our tickets to and hotel in Rio and are now working on the Foz do Iguacu leg of our trip. For that I headed to the Argentine consulate today to get a visa so that I can see these humblingly immense falls from both sides of the water. Have you ever wondered why waterfalls are always on international borders? Victoria, Niagara, Iguazu… what gives?

I will finally end up spending 2 days in Sao Paolo, (instead of the 3 I had initially thought I would); Sao Paolo is great for shopping (shoes bikinis and dresses, here I come!) and all my friends live there so I am looking forward to some nights that involve caipirinhas, delicious meats, loads of dancing and great company. Needless to say I am pretty excited to finally set foot on a previously unchartered continent (unchartered for me, silly).

Another previously unchartered continent for me happens to be Africa (UAE doesn’t count, does it?) and I had thought that I would cover that ground as early as March this year since my dear friend A-to-A is getting married there. But that is looking increasingly unlikely considering how ugly it looks to ask for downtime less than a month after returning from a Brazilian bender. And even if the leave wasn’t really an issue, it would be pretty shitty to go all the way to South Africa alone, be single at a wedding and then have no one to travel with and be reminded constantly of being single and insecure in a country with very questionable (as I am told) safety. There is also the possibility of Daddy Cool getting married in South Africa towards the end of the year and that’s going to be a whole lot easier to pull off if my b-school buddies end up going, of course that has no bearing on the decision to go now. Truth be told, I yearn for the opportunity to go to Mozambique, rather than SA.

For the last few days, I have been practicing what seems to be the world’s easiest diet, in the hope that in a span of 2 weeks, I will be transformed into a bikini-ready Brazilian supermodel. Sure. What is the world’s easiest diet? “No Carbs After 7pm”. Now who knows if this works? I seriously doubt this would work if you had a tub of butter at 730pm, so the key (according to my very fit colleague) is to “eat normally”. How am I doing this? Instead of rice, daal and yogurt, I eat daal and yogurt. Instead of rotis, veggies and yogurt, I eat veggies and yogurt. No results thus far but like I said it is easy so who knows, if not in 2 weeks, I am sure to see results in 2 months. Granted I strayed once with a pint of cider but who doesn’t?

My dining table arrives next week and I can barely contain my excitement. So today, I decided to take a walk to Lane Crawford, a very hoity-toity designer merchandise store, in the hopes of finding a beautiful vase to christen my table with. No luck. Between the highly discounted 600 HKD boring stuff and the very very unaffordable 23,000 HKD vases, I was shit out of luck. I need a big teal or orange glass vase. Lane Crawford like all the high end stores in Hong Kong has no idea what a sale is supposed to be. Bed linens retail (after discount) for 12,000 HKD (not 1,200, I checked). Manolo Blahniks go on sale for over 5000 HKD.

Well on the plus side, at least I can’t spend.

I would rather not write an update on the Eagle situation because surprise surprise, he’s a lemon and I cannot dignify his existence with an entire post of overanalysis. Apparently even near-broke twerps who don’t have a decent job can also be assholes. Who knew? I am not upset or heartbroken but it does grind my gears that I cannot go to the bathroom or get a drink of water without seeing his face every 2 hours. You should not shit where you eat, people, you really shouldn’t.

This evening, I shall go buy myself flowers and arrange them in some crappy vase I have. Someday, I will find a beautiful man who will buy me flowers, heck someday I will find a beautiful vase but for now, this will do.

p.s. Can I just say, for the millionth time, how thankful I am to past tense me for writing as much as she did? I read a few posts from 3 years ago today and I made me smile. The delight that this virtual and unending time capsule of text brings me is priceless.


4 thoughts on “modern man

  1. Been reading your blog for a long time now and love what you write.Totally liked the way you talked about many things all too together πŸ™‚ Keep it coming πŸ™‚

  2. Firefly – aloha! It's funny how many comments are like yours.. people reading without commenting. Can I whine about that? πŸ™‚ I want more comments! hahathe girl who ate too much – haha! here's to that indeed!

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