Who: Aussie Insurance Guy (AIG, oh I am so clever)
What did I wear? My blindingly pink drapey Calvin Klein skirt with a brown silk ruffled blouse that shows a hint of cleavage. This is the skirt that got me into crazy trouble several months ago on a date with a cute German boy. I realise I never told you that story but for now, know that it involved getting picked up in Spanish by a German dude from Barcelona, being the cause of a mild bar fight, and kissing a completely drunk Australian while the two other men were arguing. In other words, a normal night. ha ha, I jest.
On my way to the restaurant, he kept texting me what he was wearing to which I replied that I already knew what he looked like so telling me the colour of his tie was unnecessary. He joked that he may have gotten uglier since the picture was uploaded. Shudder. No surprises thankfully, as it turned out he was alright looking, a bit petite but with lovely blue eyes and a great smile (which is what attracted me to his profile in the first place). Looked older than the pictures with more salt/pepper hair and was very nicely dressed in a proper suit that fit. What did surprise me was that he was Australian! I had my bets on French or English given his rather fufu name. He was a Sydneysider with a mild accent, and HK was his first international move but said he’d worked in Adelaide and Melbourne and Perth and said Adelaide and Perth were so backward it was like being a different country. He even made some bogan jokes later in the night.
The night started out being quite boring as I made the mistake of asking “how was your day” which spiraled into AIG monologue-ing big time about his work – IT integration in mergers and acquisitions snorrrre-I-really-don’t-care-about-your-latest-rollout. But we got to talking about other things eventually and he even showed me pictures of his family. He loves golf and said he learnt it when he was 11 which made me think he came from money? Jin tells me I was wrong. Also supporting my money hypothesis was the fact that he was a wine snob and knew all those fancy words a snob would use to describe wine like “bouquet” and “buttery”. Now I don’t mind wine snobbery, I appreciate it in fact but only if the person orders / brings a bottle that’s nice (which isn’t usually the case!). AIG however brought it home – after our first glass, he said “let’s order a bottle” and proceeded to order a fantastic Australian red which was perfectly to my taste. “A” for good taste! I asked to order food so I wouldn’t get plastered again (but that plan clearly went to shit as the reader will later find out or has probably already guessed). We ordered pizza but he only ate two slices which sucked because I couldn’t wolf down the remaining four (even though we all know that I jolly well could have!). I need to date big eaters like myself.
Towards the end of the meal, he said he had had a terrible couple of weeks at work and that he had been really looking forward to meeting me. I thought that was a very nice thing to say.
We left The Peak Cafe for a change of scene and headed to Oola, a bistro near where we both live. I happen to hate Oola (and dislike Peak Cafe too, come to think of it, maybe I am the snob) but I didn’t protest as I’d already eaten (not really) and we were only getting drinks. He ordered us hendricks (see? good taste) and we stayed and talked till they turned the lights on to kick us out. No kissing had happened up to this point.
I am hazy on the details but I think that at this point, we had decided to walk to our respective apartments which were basically in the same direction. The same downward-sloping direction. This is when I tripped like the clutz I am and had a massive fall. Thankfully, I did not break my face but I did scrap a nice chunk of skin off my right knee. It didn’t hurt (it never does when you’re hammered) but there was blood flowing down my leg. L’elegance. Just like I would in high school decades ago, I insisted I was alright. I really was. But AIG insisted that I should go to his place. As it happened I had fallen literally steps away from his place (a serviced apartment that he has since moved out of). I protested and protested but he insisted in all earnest that I let him clean me up.
So I agreed. It turned out that he had a proper first-aid kit with bandages and betadine and gauze; he did a solid job of cleaning up and bandaging my wound. I was impressed. We drank some water and started talking again. Then he got quite complimentary and cheeky (sexy smile, tits and ass…but of course!) and we ended up making out on the couch and in a little while, moved to the bed. Then I said I had to go (first date goddamnit!) but he said “okay just stay here, no sex I promise, we can just cuddle”. I thought that was pretty cheesy but the man had just dragged me to his apartment against my will and bandaged up my wounds. He wasn’t exactly a bastard.
I still got up and said I had to leave because I had lenses on (and periods but didn’t tell him that). So he proposed that we have a sleepover at my place instead.
I agreed because I am nuts and I had to give him credit for being 31 and suggesting a pajama party. He changed out of his bespoke suit into nice jeans and a navy blue big pony polo and we walked the 100m walk from my place to his. And we had our sleepover. It was utterly cute and PG-rated. I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried, I promise you. The next morning I joked that he had tripped me on purpose because it was suspicious that he had such a consummate first aid kit so he must use this trick a lot to get girls up to his place. In turn he asked if we could hang out again the very same night but I had other plans already. He asked “another sleepover?”. In reality, I had a date with an Indian dude that approached my family through the Great Indian Arranged Marriage Network so sleepover was out of the question, ha! We agreed on the following Tuesday.
Overall I thought AIG was lovely and had good taste but maybe lacked substance. I can’t decide yet. I wouldn’t mind seeing him again but wouldn’t be devastated if I didn’t.
Update: I cancelled Tuesday (today) as I have a play to go to with Hazel and Jin. I did however text him yesterday to see how his move went and haven’t heard back yet. If that morning’s conversation is anything to go by, he’s gotten sucked in by work, the move and friends visiting. Or this wasn’t meant to go past a first date. And as I said earlier, I am not devastated.
P.S. Stay tuned for the epic update on my epic date #7 with the scientist and for my ranty update of date #9 with the snobbish Indian.